


Patch Job

by Feelysonheelys



Category: The Aquabats! Super Show!
Genre: Breaking Reality, Critical Existence Failure, Gen, In-Universe Continuity Errors, Possible Character Death, Posthumous Mailtime, The Time Sprinkler (Mentioned), Time Loop
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-02
Updated: 2018-08-02
Packaged: 2019-06-20 10:09:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15531954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Feelysonheelys/pseuds/Feelysonheelys
Summary: To my dearest friends,If you are reading this, there is a 98% chance that I have never physically existed, which is kind of a downer.





	Patch Job

To my dearest friends, The Aquabats!

 

If you are reading this, there is a 98% chance that I have never physically existed, which is kind of a downer. Of course, if you’ve found this message, that means you’ve found it in my lab, which indicates a possible combination of the following:

  1. There is still physical evidence of my existence (good!)
  2. You remember who I am (VERY good, in some respects. Also very sad.)
  3. You are lost and confused.



Of course, the third option may not have any bearing on this specific situation, but it’s a viable option nonetheless. It is fair to assume that if there is any part of me that has survived this, I will fall into that category myself. Hopefully, however, I can explain our situation in a manner that will not confuse you any further, and I will deliver this explanation in a casual letter as opposed to a research paper so that I do not lose your attention in a sea of medical terms, technical jargon, and fancy-pants science stuff. (James, I know that you would not mind knowing the technical side of things, but I must keep this informal so that you can all understand equally. I would not recommend following my methods anyway.)

It has been a year since your disappearance following the battle with Space Monster M. The people have mourned. The cadets. The kids. You’re heroes, boys. You always were, but the world knows it now, and you’re gone. Well! Not  _ now _ , anyway. Assuming all has worked out, you’re back in action and ready to protect the world that needs you. If I know you all half as well as I think I do, you didn’t look a gift Battletram under the hood, did you? (The tram’s fine. I’m being metaphorical.) What I mean is that you didn’t investigate how you were able to return to Earth. 

Getting you back on the planet wouldn’t have been difficult. I don’t monitor the Battletram consistently, but seeing as it’s my own creation, I have to keep some tabs on it. I enabled the remote tracking device the moment I heard the news, and for a little while, it seemed that getting you home would be as easy as finding the ratio of a circle’s circumference to its diameter.

Then you vanished completely. I ran tests, it was not an equipment malfunction. One moment you were in lunar orbit, the next-- poof! Right out of existence. Just pulled out of reality. I’d hypothesized on pockets of space/time before, but never expected to be able to send test subjects into a stable time loop of my own! It would have been incredible if I didn’t have a sliver of a conscience left in me. 

Do you remember anything of the loop? I know it’s unlikely, and I’m not physically here to listen to your answer, but it must be absolutely fascinating if your memories haven’t been scrambled like eggs.

Right. That. I’ve been meaning to get here.

...I’m so sorry. 

To put it delicately, if reality was defined by a sheet of cloth, as it often is in metaphors, I have to tear a rough hole in it to get you back. The hole, however, is going to be patched, or sewn back together, and the cloth will never be exactly the same as it had been before I cut it. 

It’s going to be unlikely that I change history in any major way, and if I do, you never will have known it. But you will be changed. You will still be the Aquabats, I’m sure of it. But while this is the most intricate and complicated task I’ve ever set myself to-- and believe me, that is  _ saying something _ \-- it is a rough, sloppy job, and I don’t know how the universe is going to handle it. It may not even leave you all with the same memories: it will be as though the world began existing when you return to it, and anything that anyone remembers is what existence itself is trying to convince them is true.  

I wish there had been another way, I really do, but I couldn’t just leave you there. There’s no telling what a self-contained loop like that could do if allowed to persist into eternity, and the world of present reality needs you. I am almost certain that I will be written out of reality during the patch-job, and even if I remain, it would be best that I lay low. Whatever was powerful and angry enough to pull you out of time isn’t going to be very happy with the meddling human who pulled you back, and I don’t want whatever they would have in store for me. If you have any memories of me, they are likely versions of what or who I am in this new timeline. That’s okay. The ability to resist the effects of rewritten reality is a superpower all in itself, and it’s highly unlikely that any of you have developed it. All I ask is that you continue to be The Aquabats for this world, and excuse any of the weird present-past-future tense changes in this letter (YOU try writing a letter about changing the nature of reality to be read after you no longer exist). 

I love you, my Aquabats.

 

Sincerely,

A Secret Friend.

**Author's Note:**

> I'll admit, this is more of a fan theory than a piece of fiction, but I hope I did it justice and I'd love to discuss it further.


End file.
